5 Ways to Balance Writing and Life

I recently watched a Lee Jessup video in which she wisely stated that reading scripts—whether you’re a consultant, contest judge, agent, manager, or assistant—is a lifestyle.

As a screenwriter, that stuck with me. Because choosing to be a writer is a lifestyle, too.

Without a boss or definitive hours to be ‘at work,’ we’re always working, whether it’s putting words on the page or thinking about it, or worse, in that self-destructive zone of feeling like that’s what we should be thinking about and working on.

Which begs the question, if you’re always thinking about the world you’re moving through in terms of your script, are you ever truly present in your day-to-day life? Does the writing ever get to take a beat so we can shut off? More importantly: Should it?

Here are five ways to find balance between writing, life, and all the ways they intersect.

This is so much easier said than done. It begins with setting boundaries with people and schedules. Getting more specific about when you write can help you get into the work faster and begin reframing it as if it’s the job you already have. 

Let’s break down “getting more specific” even more. Pay close attention to your week. What times of day and days of the week are you most productive with your writing? And when are you most energized to get related admin work done? From there, block those times on your calendar and focus on only the tasks you set out to do. You may want to pencil in “work on script,” but instead, try “work on Act II, part A” for however many sessions you think it’ll realistically take you, and so on. Being specific will help you feel like you’ve accomplished what you set out to do, making it more likely you’ll return to the page.

And don’t discount short bursts of time, either. We all love the idea of a luxurious afternoon spent cranking out pages at a café, uninterrupted. But what about that 20-30 minutes of downtime between when the dishes are done and Netflix is switched on? Instead of scrolling, open Final Draft. 

Also, try timed, micro, minimum word counts. Whatever your writing sessions look like, the key is to make them regular. The more you practice, just like with a musical instrument or yoga, the more the writing muscle is primed and ready to go when you are. 

Sounds a helluva lot like setting boundaries. But with intention, it’s a wholly different and important part of a writer’s vocabulary. Saying no to a fun night out with friends because that’s the only writing time available this week? That can feel like a loss. But in the long run, being honest will help you to validate your time spent writing to yourself, as well, even more importantly than validating it to others. Friends and family members may or may not understand, and even if they don’t fully fathom what you’re doing, chances are, they’ll still support you because of your valued relationship.

Also important is to let go of expectations and the notion that what others think of us has anything to do with us. That one, my friends, is extraordinarily difficult. Especially in an industry where our creative work is regularly subject to other people’s opinions. 

So say no to the extra social event, or when you’re ready to call it a night, do so! That way, you can still feel like you’re engaging in life along with prioritizing your own needs, by being home at an hour that makes you feel like you can either still get some writing in, or wake up refreshed enough to do it then. 

Writing time is precious and a worthy endeavor. Engaging in the practice of it will help you show up more present when you are with friends and family because you have also met your own needs. 

Be present. Don’t go into the family reunion or monthly coffee with that friend thinking you’re going to use the conversations or any drama that comes up for your writing. If it emerges in your writing as an event or feeling later, it will matter no matter what. That’s writing; we draw from experience. But that’s also the key: have the experience first. 

And if there’s a particularly busy time period coming up, allow yourself the grace to not write. In fact, block that time off and don’t hold yourself to a word count. Set yourself a “return to office” date so you’re still accountable in the long run and sit down at the page again, refreshed and ready to go. This comes back to treating screenwriting like the job you want it to be (see point 1!).

As I mentioned, and we’re already all aware, life doesn’t always allow all the time we wish for ourselves when it comes to writing. Equip yourself with the tools and skills to hop into a session when the opportunity arises. 

Carry a small notebook and pen, have the FD Go app on your tablet or phone, and be open to the moment. Waiting for the doctor who’s classically already twenty minutes late to start your appointment? Stop scrolling and open your work in progress instead. These tiny micro-sessions add up. And as we’ve already covered, the more often we get into the work, the easier that muscle is to exercise as we flow into and out of a quick writing session.

But you also just said not to turn everything into work. True. This is more about those Monday - Friday moments, the ones you’ve already pre-set as possible writing times. The ones that work for you, but might’ve been interrupted or rescheduled for other Life Events. Make the most of them instead of stewing over the fact that you’re still in the waiting room.

Don’t overthink the writing. That’s why there’s such a thing as multiple drafts! Get your ideas on the page, let your subconscious work through them between sessions, and come back at your next scheduled writing time inspired. 

Becoming like the palm tree: strong in your purpose, flexible with the whims of the wind—or rather, whatever life decides to inadvertently and inevitably throw at you—is a crucial skill. Feel the frustration: then do what’s gotta be done and come back to the writing when you can.

So when your insides are vibrating like those little metal balls, pinging this way and that inside their glass enclosure, making you feel the pressure building and building until it threatens to burst into a million little pieces, and you feel as though your priorities are scattering into a million directions…

Take a breath.

Reset.

Make a list of your priorities. Devise a schedule from there.

And live your life, with writing as a part of it.